We live in a world of pursuing goals. While attending school, we aim at having better grades. (OK, sometimes it is our parents who aim at us having better grades…) We do math exercises and read classical poems with the perspective that this will lead to better half-year results. It is worth it! Good half-year results should allow us to get accepted to better secondary school. Parents and teachers keep on telling us that our future depends on it. Willing or not, we end up believing it. We exercise a lot and do our best on the mock tests. We pass the test, get accepted wherever we wanted and… It starts all over again. Here are A-levels to come. You need good grades in maths and physics to end up studying engineering. You need top grades in biology and chemistry if you wish to study medicine. You know it. Now it is not only parents and teachers talking the same phrases. Now also your classmates started to do the same. The more you listen to them, the more motivated you are. You are stressed, but it motivates you. You work hard with the perspective of pursuing your dream. At the end of the day, it is all what it is about, right? You always wanted to study law. Or psychology. Or biochemistry. So here you go. You read and make exercises. You go through the books again and again. Days go by and by exam time you know them by heart. You pass A-leves (finally!) and get accepted to study law. Or psychology. Or biochemistry. You feel like your life is about to start. You will be doing what you always wanted. You will be pursuing your dream. You will be happy.
But suddenly the studies start. You start focusing on law. Or psychology. Or biochemistry. You have some projects to hand in and bunch of material to study for exams. You are stressed, but you are able to convince yourself that it will go better after this semester. You see clearly where you are heading. The goal is to pass this semester. You feel relieve when it is done and… You say the same to yourself the next semester. And the next one. And the one after that. You endlessly keep on repeating to yourself that you will be better after you will have achieved your goal. You will be happier once it will be accomplished. But once you are there, you forget to enjoy it. Instead you set yourself another goal and start slowly heading towards it.
This way you finish studies, find a job and get engaged in your first serious project. This way you accomplish your second and third project. This way you get promoted and this way you buy a car. This way you start your company and this way you build a house. Day by day, you are focused on achieving some goal. You want to make a postgraduate course to get more respect in your working environment. You want to improve your language skills to get a better job. You want to earn some money to buy your own flat. You are constantly chasing something – be it prestige, qualifications or money.
You think achieving your goal is a necessary prerequisite for happiness. You work hard on it, believing it will make you live your dreams. But once you are there, you realize that in is not that. That you can do more. That you can do better. So you keep on chasing.
During my travel to Latin America I have never met someone whose goal was to buy a house. I have never seen anyone whose aim was to get promoted. I have never seen anyone focused on one big personal project. Yet, I have seen many smiling people. People whose main objective was simply to enjoy afternoon coffee with their friends.
